A baby story floods my tele

I have spent the entire morning watching a Baby Story and all of the other new baby shows on TLC.  I dont know why I do this to myself.  I must be a glutton for punishment.  It's almost like I live vicariously through these TV shows.  I love watching new babies come into the world and see the families all filled with so much joy.  Its a joy that I felt almost fourteen years ago when I delivered my one and only surviving child.  I wish I would have known then what I know now.  I would have soaked in every single experience.  I foolishly thought that I would go on to have many more children.  I was presumptuous just like every other woman.  I feel like I have breezed through my son's life.  I soaked in a lot, but not enough.  I feel like I missed out on so much.  I was young, and stupid. 

I love my son.  More than anything in this entire world.

On a side note,
My throat has been feeling scratchy on the right side all morning.  I cant wait for my 4 o'clock appointment .